Phase 2 and 3 of my formal education

As promised more on ‘finishing school’. After high school (for the most part, uneventfully, but more on that later), I went on to college at nearby Rutgers University. I wasn’t too sure what to make of it, except that it was an extension of required knowledge prior to getting my life ‘started’. I chose RU (and was thrilled they chose me) as I thought since about 13-14 yrs of age that the science of pharmacy was fascinating. Then a friend’s dad told me it could also be lucrative, and offered very diverse opportunities, from selling, to compounding, to hospitals, to business, and on and on. One thing was for sure, I’d never be without a job as long as I wanted to work. For the daughter of Depression survivors and, later, a single mom (actually, a widow, not a single mom by choice or design but nonetheless devastating), durable employability was/is important.

After college, I went to work, married and started my family, all rather natural steps for me. But, from a career perspective, not exactly Gloria Steinem-esque (may require a Google search for some of you….I’ll wait…..). I knew that having my children early was healthy (for me and them…well maybe more so for me…they may have benefited from more experience on my part, but water under the bridge now). But having children just a year into my career brought some challenges for equity and parody in career goals and rewards down the line. Yet, this was my choice, I was (and am) proud of it and began thinking of ways to jumpstart my career, when I was ready.

I tried to gain as much experience as possible while maintaining my focus on my family during this ‘off-ramping’ process [which, by the way, I recently heard an ‘expert’ talking about off-ramping only to find that the ‘experts’ consider a career diversion (aka kids ….? humm) to be 3-5 years. I was a bit longer (about 10 years longer) as I don’t know many kids who are self-sufficient at 5, but, again, I digress]. My experience during this time included teaching my children and others ( a lot), learning from my children and others (also a lot), volunteering, running organizations, fund raising, political office, project management, sampling the diversity of my career opportunities and rounding it all out with back to school…for me.

A doctorate degree was always enticing to me (1) because the terminal degree in my undergrad studies was so very exciting and (2) that would surely provide the jump start and hopefully manage the ‘gap’ in ‘full time’ employment that was likely to work against me when I chose to return to my career.

Interestingly, at one of the interviews when I was selecting a FT position, an interviewer…female of course, asked why did I think I could handle a FT job? This after I had noted that my resume included predominately PT out of the home work, but also noting the significant amount of unpaid work I did concurrently. So, on average, I was ‘working’ 6am until ~11:30pm 6 days a week and a short day on Sunday (7am-2pm) except on Sunday nights when I ran the local Youth Group meetings. Was she kidding, I thought? So I asked, “Are you kidding?” She just looked at me, puzzled and then looked away. She asks which of the 2 positions was I most interested in? I respond, “Which group do you work with?” And I offered that I’d prefer the other. Again, she seemed puzzled. At this point, I interject, “this interview is probably is not going to have a great outcome, so why don’t I just leave you to write up your thoughts and wait outside for the HR guy to come back to take me to lunch?” She agrees. Needless to say, I was not offered either of those positions. Later, more on my learning curve from working with candid, innocent children to savvy, political adults…much more steep than the academic challenges, and ongoing still.

I did complete my graduate work, while my kids were in middle school and some high school, so we all learned together. At the culmination, I did my research project with elderly subjects and teaching them about good pharmaceutical care. Pretty neat stuff. Soon after graduating, but already back in my career track, I decided one more degree was important to fill a gap in my understanding. I completed an MBA program while working and high school/college for my kids.

Before we leave this blog, I must send out a special recognition and thank you to my family. Without the support of my husband and children, none of this would be possible. During the first return to school, I monopolized the VCR (lectures on tape) and disappeared for 12 hour Saturday classes or later for whole weekends. I was working PT through some of this, but away from home (or at home and ‘busy’) full time. More dinners than I’d like were take out; laundry was slow; special treats were more often “semi-homemade” and virtually every where we went, I had a book with me. All in all, dealing with what most others do and we survived. The patience and understanding of my family was essential for these successes and continues to be critical for everything I do or accomplish. It may not have taken a ‘village’ to raise my children, but it certainly took my husband, my children and I working together to earn my post grad degrees. Only shame is that only one name per diploma ( when I make the rules, that one gets amended).